aku juga seorang akak...walaupun akak yang quite tak gune

Frankly speaking, I dun have much talent to be a big sis. Most of the time I would act as if I am the youngest child in my family, with my selfishness and my tendency to get easily irritated. In our family portrait, I even looked like an effin middle child, coz a 15-year-old teenage boy grows up so fast, there's no way his 18-year-old sis could catch up. I have stopped giving priority to my bros (e.g. "Ko habiskanlah, akak xmo lagi") coz for some unknown reasons, I am becoming more and more greedy/selfish/childish (?). I dunno. Man, I dunno.

Ever since I was, ugh, five or something, I have always wanted to have a big bro. I figured out that it would be great to have an older male sibling to take care of me (big bros always/most of the time/sometimes do *circle the word best describe yours*). When you have a big bro, the number of your encounters with bastards/perverts/sex offenders will be significantly reduced. Most probably, your freedom will be slightly reduced as well, but that's a small price to pay in order to get greater benefits. And ever since I was 4 (before the birth of my bro) I have always wanted to have a younger sis.Then we could play girly games together, mess with mum's makeup together, talk about boyfriends and love and puberty *tsk* together, and (later in life) share our interest in lolita together. Yeah, that could be very interesting.

But God gave me two younger bros. One is now 15, another is 10.

I am not trying to sound negative, really. Despite not being able to have my desired set of siblings, I am contented with my current one. I think they are cool. They have great talents. One is an aspiring mangaka, the other an aspiring guitarist. As usual, younger bros can be quite annoying, but I do believe that I have my contribution in that. I mean, 'annoying' could be an exaggeration, since I myself am easily annoyed and terrible in anger management. Whatever.

Since our family is a freekingly awkward family which doesn't believe in friendly verbal/written conversations or obvious gestures of affection, we hardly talked to each other (me and them, they and me. I'm alienated, coz I'm a girl, and mum said incest cases are rising). Despite sharing the same interests (Visual Kei, manga/anime, music, the arts, games), we hardly go beyond exchanging mp3s/softwares/occasional VK infos. And most of the time it's through Facebook. (It's the only place where we can freely interact as siblings). Told you our family is freekingly awkward. And most of the time, my verbal interactions with them involve me ordering them to do miscellaneous stuffs related to mum's kuih business ("Kopek kentang 4 kilo!" "Gi wat ikan bilis!" "Wei, kemasla tu!" "Pegi antar kuih! Pastu balik! Wei, dengar tak ni?"). As you can see, most of the time I'm being harsh towards them. Anger management wtf.

But who said I don't feel guilty about that? I do, and I hope I can be a better sis. But what the hell, years of being a member of the Freekingly Awkward Family, as well as my massive ego, refrained me from saying sorry face-to-face. So instead, I'm writing it on my blog.

Adik-adik, akak mintak maaf. Nanti akak belanje Pizza Hut.

*Pizza Hut is always a winner, btw*

To my bros, I'm at risk of sounding awkward and/or tacky, but I'm going to say it anyway. Faez, xkisahla dpt brape pn 4 ur PMR, PMR tu PMR, it's just a pathway, SPM tu yg penting. And oh, Happy Birthday, again. Hakim, sorry akak slalu marah2. Akak mmg camtu. Tp ubahla kalo xnak akak marah2 lg. Tolong mak, sian die. Thanks sebab slalu tolong. Dah2, ni dah terlebih tacky nih. I must stop.